吐槽 Novels

The protagonist transmigrates into a dark xianxia novel, becoming the doomed aloof master who, in the future, will be killed by his disciple—the male lead—as part of his "slay-the-mentor-to-ascend" arc. He dies horribly. Very, very horribly. To make matters worse, he’s bound to a system that insists he must play the role of the aloof master, either "redeeming" the disciple and saving the world or eliminating him to escape fate. The blackened male lead will arrive at the sect in 20 years. The protagonist ignores this entirely. Under the system’s watchful eye, he stares at his disciple roster for the time it takes an incense stick to burn… and then decides to hold a group meeting. Next, he opens the sect’s library. Then he orders all disciples to divide the labor of reading every text in the library within five years, submitting weekly progress reports and monthly literature reviews. Each disciple receives a stipend based on performance evaluations; failure to meet deadlines results in delayed graduation. With 20 years until the male lead’s arrival, the protagonist spends the time speculating on nearby real estate, building houses, and promoting the virtues of homeownership—ensuring the male lead arrives burdened by a mortgage. Then forces him to work for his master to pay it off. Three years in: the protagonist finishes reading the entire sect library. Five years in: he establishes the sect’s academic journal. Ten years in: he encourages other sects across the cultivation world to launch their own journals. Fifteen years in: he creates the first-ever cultivation journal, *Science*. Eighteen years in: academic conferences and journals proliferate. The protagonist seizes the moment to introduce a patent office. After the male lead joins, he engineers hyperinflation and launches a futures market. ... Two centuries later, the cultivation world trembles as they realize: any act of cultivation involving registered patents requires paying intellectual property taxes. Even demonic cultivators face cross-border prosecution. Whether madmen or geniuses, everyone is now drowning in academia, taxes, admissions, and stocks. No one has time to follow the original male lead’s evil schemes. Romance can’t compare to being a doctoral advisor. The protagonist will dominate—no, *save*—the cultivation world with knowledge. Now, the only thing he’s pondering is which new method to use to delay the male lead’s graduation by another 20 years—just as the boy glimpses freedom and considers rebellion. After all, the male lead is *really* good at grinding.

Jiang Lechen—the most pig-slaughtering idol, and the most dance-singing veterinarian. As a minor idol in a training-style boy band, Jiang feels less like he’s chasing dreams in the entertainment industry and more like enduring military drills. From Monday to Friday, he struggles through 8 AM university classes, fighting tooth and nail for attendance and GPA. After class, he rushes to the company for dance, vocal, and acting lessons. Weekends are spent in the dorm, waiting for elusive stage opportunities. He considers himself a part-time idol—others might sacrifice their lives for the stage, but he just wants to scrape by on the 2,000-yuan base salary. Friends advise him: "The contract termination fee isn’t high—if it’s too much, just quit and go back to being a normal person!" Jiang Lechen: "No! I think I can struggle a bit longer. The temple monk said I’m destined to blow up!" Who knew those words would come true? Jiang Lechen… actually blew up! But after becoming famous, why are domineering CEOs, top-tier seniors, aloof roommates, fellow band juniors, and renowned directors (cast in alphabetical order by pinyin)… all trying to invite him for a late-night "fluorescent script-reading" session? —————————— "If you like summer evenings, lounging in flip-flops at the alley’s entrance, watching the rush of commuters fade into twilight; If you like strategizing for chess-playing uncles in the park, greeting every passing pup with earnest delight; If you like grabbing an orange soda from a corner shop’s fridge, chugging it down in one go, then burping citrus into the night… …Then you’ll *love* Jiang Lechen."

"Dumb and Dumb" Yuan Chaoyu transmigrates into a cannon fodder bottom character in an old-fashioned melodramatic novel. And he's currently pregnant. His husband is the "global economic overlord" Dongfang Boyan, a cold and obsessive tycoon who doesn’t love him—their marriage is just for appearances. In the book, the original host tries desperately to win Dongfang Boyan’s heart, only to end up in a mental institution, while his child ends up calling the protagonist bottom 'Dad.' Yuan Chaoyu: So scary! I’m divorcing him and taking the baby far away from those two scumbags! Just remember to transfer the alimony on time, and I’ll never bother you again! Dongfang Boyan: Divorce? Hmm, still dreaming? *Mwah!* Sweetheart, go back to sleep—I’ll change the baby’s diaper.

Synopsis: He Jia, a professional slacker in the male-oriented fiction world, gets exiled to the Quick Transmigration Bureau’s "Fill-in-the-Pit" department after offending the domineering CEO male lead from Green JJ. Countless authors have abandoned their stories here, leaving countless pitiful fictional characters trapped. He Jia fumes with righteous anger: "How could this happen?!" Facing the mournful gazes of countless male leads, He Jia pats their shoulders: "Bro, don’t worry. I’ll save you." He Jia swears he just wants to complete the abandoned plots, rescue the poor male leads, and return to the male-oriented fiction world as soon as possible. Little did he expect the male leads he kept calling "bro" would start looking at him... differently. * "Back then, nobody told me I was transmigrating into BL novels." Years later, He Jia lights a cigarette, clutching his sore waist as he gazes sorrowfully at the sky: "...I guess this is what they call ‘bending with the wind.’" 1v1, crack-filled sweet romance, fast-paced quick transmigration, ML (male lead) has multiple personas. World 1: The Sweet Romance Male Lead Is Actually Me World 2: The Canary Is Actually Me World 3: The Healing Type Is Actually Me World 4: The Pure High Schooler Is Actually Me World 5: The Scum Male Is Actually Me P.S.: This is an expanded version of a draft previously posted on XQ~ If it seems familiar, yes, it’s indeed by the same person (covers face). Recommended work by my friend: 《The Beauty Master Tears Up the Cannon Fodder Script [Transmigration]》by Belly Has a Pond

Ning Luo possesses one of the greatest virtues of modern youth: emotional stability. Stable insanity. But he only dares to lose it internally—outwardly, he remains a shy and innocent boy. After an accident, he transmigrates into the body of a blacklisted, scandal-ridden idol sharing his name. Ning Luo recalls the original owner’s repeated self-sabotage and eventual demise as cannon fodder, falling into silence. Insanity! Pure insanity! === Recently, many in the entertainment industry stumbled upon a shocking secret. They could read minds! The target? None other than the ever-dramatic Ning Luo. Director Wang despised Ning Luo for pulling strings to get roles. During a dinner with an investor, just as he was about to sign a contract, he suddenly heard Ning Luo’s inner scream: [AAAAAH WHY ARE YOU SIGNING WITHOUT A BACKGROUND CHECK?? Director Wang, are you out of your mind? This investor’s a money-laundering criminal!] [The crew’s doomed and so am I hahaha, but I’m not going down with them—time to find a new gig!] Director Wang: "..." Days later, the investor was exposed, and Director Wang dodged a bullet. He sought out Ning Luo: "Ning Luo, right? Found a new gig yet? If not, I’ve got some resources for you—take your pick!" Ning Luo: ? This… is a thing? - While filming, actor Lin Yanyi accidentally overheard Ning Luo’s thoughts: [This guy’s insanely hot, but why’s he so much taller? Listen, I won’t touch you… yet (restraining myself). After I drink more milk and grow 5cm (flips hair), you’ll be swooning over me (deep voice).] Lin Yanyi, used to praise, had never encountered anything this unhinged. But his expression froze at Ning Luo’s next thought: [Wait… didn’t he get disfigured later in an on-set explosion?] Lin Yanyi dismissed the nonsense about foreseeing the future. Yet three days later, the pyrotechnics malfunctioned—but thanks to his subconscious caution, he escaped unharmed. Afterward, he tracked down Ning Luo: "Master, what other calamities await me? Name your price—3 million per tip, or you set the rate!" Ning Luo swallowed his refusal. - Once, Ning Luo crossed paths with the award-winning actor Lu Tingzhou. [HOLY SHIT, HUSBAND!!!] This man was his exact type—precision strike! Lu Tingzhou paused mid-motion, glancing at Ning Luo, who stood out even among stars. [HE LOOKED AT ME AAAAAH!!!] Lu Tingzhou smirked, amused. Then: [Hubby, even if your family betrays you, your friends desert you, and your subordinates stab you in the back… You’re not out of options.] [You can always die.] Lu Tingzhou’s smile vanished. Later, he learned Ning Luo called every man matching his taste "husband." Warning: lethal doses of internet memes. Enter at your own risk.

Shu You transmigrated into a cannon fodder character in a novel who was greedy, hypocritical, selfish, and only cared about money. The original owner of the body had pursued the main character for his wealth but abandoned him when he fell on hard times. In the end, he died a miserable death in a foreign land.Upon arriving in this new world, Shu You dragged his suitcase and faced the main character who was trying to persuade him to stay. He shouted, “Do you still think you’re the wealthy young master of the Lin family? No! You’re just a poor man now!”Behind him, the main character’s eyes darkened, and he clenched his fist.“…So we have to live frugally! I’ll sell everything we don’t need!”Lin Mingxu: ???Shu You, who had been known as the stingiest dragon in his past life, looked critically at the branded bags, designer clothes, and diamond rings that the original owner had collected.“All of this, this, and this… I’ll sell them all!”Only money could provide him with the greatest sense of security! All he wanted was money!Once the main character was rejected by the main character he pursued and offered to break up, Shu You could happily continue to live as a single miser with his money.However, what Shu You didn’t know was that Lin Mingxu had been reborn.When the weather turned cold, Lin Mingxu admitted that he couldn’t afford to pay the heating bill, and Shu You left him when he couldn’t stand it anymore.Shu You was delighted, “Why bother paying such an expensive heating bill? Let’s just lie down together and use a couple of extra blankets!”When it got too hot, the antagonist came knocking, but Lin Mingxu’s expression turned icy, and he wanted to see him leave without explanation.Shu You flipped the table and said, “You don’t understand the trap of consumerism! You’re so vulgar! How could you, someone brainwashed by capital, understand anything!”The first time Lin Mingxu used an electric blanket, he thought, “What is this thing? It’s too hot!” It wasn’t because he was watching Shu You’s nosebleed!Later, Lin Mingxu couldn’t pretend anymore.He took Shu You to the company and implied that he was no longer poor and that Shu You didn’t have to be so thrifty.When Shu You turned his head and saw the original main character, he suddenly realized, “Don’t worry, I won’t delay things. I’ll leave right away!”Shu You asked, “Why? What’s wrong with the original main character?”Lin Mingxu said, “…he orders four dishes at a meal and uses too many napkins.”Shu You: ???…Wait a minute, weren’t you praising him for being open and generous?

Da Yan Crown Prince Xiao Ling suddenly transmigrates into the modern world, landing in the C-spot of the entertainment industry with his stunning looks—only to become the universally hated, officially pushed “industry embarrassment.” Xiao Ling: QAQ He decides to clear his name and turn over a new leaf. On the first day of his redemption, he flawlessly recites exact passages from the Four Books and Five Classics on a variety show, breaking the internet. On the second day, a video of him practicing swordplay in traditional attire goes viral, with netizens exclaiming, “Divinely breathtaking!” On the third day, he realizes he's run into familiar faces— Huh? Why does this variety show director look exactly like his doting royal uncle? And why does the editor-in-chief who posted the video resemble that imperial censor who used to scold him daily? Director: Greetings, Your Highness. Editor: Mwah, Your Highness~ —Did you all form a team to grind the entertainment industry dungeon?! I just want to be an idol properly—stop pampering me like the Crown Prince! #Life as the universe’s ultimate group pet is exhausting# On the fourth day, the company gets new leadership, and the freshly appointed CEO gives an on-site masterclass. When Xiao Ling finally meets the big-shot CEO who’s pulling out all the stops to make him famous, his entire world is rocked. This man… this man looks exactly like his former tutor, Senior Mentor Xue Wenshu! The very same Xue Wenshu whose clothes he once tore, into whose robes he stuffed crickets, and whom he constantly provoked! The perpetually icy CEO smiles faintly: “Long time no see, my little Highness.”

A top classical dancer transmigrated to ancient times and, to make a living, disguised himself as a woman to become a top courtesan.Su Yunrao carefully kept up his disguise, planning to earn enough for his sister’s medicine and the silver to buy land, then immediately get out. But unexpectedly, a noble and prominent wealthy patron appeared, slapped down a stack of silver notes, and wanted to buy out all of Su Yunrao’s time.Su Yunrao clutched his disguise and trembled…Wait, what was the patron’s name again? Oh, his surname was Chai, given name Ran—he was His Highness Prince Rui of the current dynasty.Wait a second—wasn’t this the playboy male lead from Falling in Love with the Runaway Princess Consort?! Because of his bad reputation, his betrothed princess consort ran away from the marriage. In a rage, the male lead frequented brothels and kept a courtesan. But this was all just out of spite. Although the male lead bought out the courtesan, he didn’t sleep with her. In the end, he would meet and get to know the runaway female lead, and they would become a pair of bickering lovers. All the other women he had previously kept were dismissed with generous compensation.