I Got Caught Writing Fanfiction About the Emperor

Han Min held two jobs simultaneously. By day, he was the Court Diarist, following Emperor Fu Xun and recording his daily activities. By night, he was Songyan Moke of White Stone Publishing House, author of the ten-volume series *The Emperor and Certain Court Affairs*. One day while on duty, Fu Xun reclined on his couch reading a book. Han Min crept closer cautiously: "Your Majesty, what are you reading? Might this servant record it?" Fu Xun languidly held up *Certain Affairs of the Sovereign and His Chancellor*: "The prose is exaggerated—hardly your usual style." Han Min was about to kneel and beg forgiveness when Fu Xun tossed the book aside and steadied him: "This sovereign did not grow up with the Imperial Censor, nor did I share childhood camaraderie with the Chancellor. As for traveling and lodging together with the Palace Examination Graduate—that never happened." Fu Xun continued: "On the contrary, it was you who grew up with me, bonded in youth, and now accompany me daily. So why write about others?" Han Min was terrified and meant to plead for mercy but bit his own tongue instead. Han Min: "*Ptui.*" Fu Xun: ???