Hopelessly Romantic Long Aotian VS Absurd Straight Bottom
Office worker Chen Zemen transmigrates into a male-oriented wish-fulfillment novel, becoming the lackey sidekick at the protagonist Lu Zhuonian’s side.
Lu Zhuonian, the eldest young master of Beijing’s elite circles, comes from a wealthy family with a powerful background. Handsome and striking, he is the crowned prince adored by everyone, even among the young masters.
To curry favor with Lu Zhuonian, Chen Zemen abandons his dignity and principles, working diligently and answering every summons. Yet Lu Zhuonian’s friends treat him as nothing more than a dog.
The young masters order him around, play tricks on him, sneer at him, and humiliate him.
As an overworked employee, Chen Zemen’s fists clench with rage.
I’m the only one not enjoying this wish-fulfillment novel?! Why!!!
When no one helps me achieve my ambitions, I shall tread through the snow to the mountaintop myself. It is time to let these young masters witness the true power of an evil office worker.
*
But Chen Zemen never expected that the “orders and humiliations” others spoke of would actually be—
Young Master A goes out. He has a driver, but insists that Chen Zemen come pick him up instead.
Chen Zemen rushes over, battered by the wind and dust. A tosses him the keys to a luxury car and sneers, “Even dogs won’t ride in that junk. The color of this Maserati suits you perfectly. Drive it away.”
Young Master B buys a house. He has a real estate agent, but insists that Chen Zemen accompany him instead.
Chen Zemen has only just touched the redwood furniture in the luxury mansion when B tosses him a house-purchase contract. “I bought you one while I was at it. See more of the world, and you won’t think redwood is expensive anymore.”
Young Master C invests. He has a financial adviser, but insists that Chen Zemen invest for him instead.
Chen Zemen stares at the stocks, his eyes going blank. C throws him a bank card and says disdainfully, “Here’s ten million to practice with. The profits are yours; I’ll cover the losses.”
…
This… is this really humiliation?
It’s… kind of satisfying, too.
Under the corrosive influence of money, Chen Zemen loses all his strength and schemes.
Ambition: -40%
Number of properties: +40
Evil power: -100
Bank balance: +100,000,000,000
*
When Young Master D prepares to give Chen Zemen the little puppy he has grown tired of playing with, the usually unflappable Lu Zhuonian loses his composure.
Lu Zhuonian pins Chen Zemen into a corner, his gaze dark and heavy. “They treat you this way because they’re following my orders. Don’t you have anything to say to me?”
Chen Zemen’s lashes tremble slightly. He looks up at Lu Zhuonian, then quickly lowers his head and says, extremely bashfully, “C-could you… humiliate me a little more?”
_
Later, Chen Zemen, pressed against the floor-to-ceiling window, deeply regrets spouting nonsense for the sake of money.
Lu Zhuonian grips his neck and forces him to look at himself in the mirror. His breath is hot and damp, his voice low and hoarse. “Mianmian, do you like being humiliated like this?”
*Reading Guide*
【1】The top is sick—the kind of sickness that cannot be mentioned in the blurb.
【2】Both are sexually inexperienced.
【3】The top is a super hopeless romantic born into immense wealth and privilege.
【4】The bottom’s name comes from: “Beneath the moon and before the wind, free and at ease; sing when inspired, sleep when tired.” Judging from the mood of it, he seems to have a fairly high tolerance?
【5】The little puppy Young Master D wants to give away is an actual dog, but the top thinks it is the other kind of dog and panics.
【6】Large numbers of red envelopes will appear in the comments section. They are sent randomly by the system, with no prompting or hidden implications. Please do not read too much into them.
Seeking readers for my upcoming work: ❤ “The Special Techniques of a Foolish Emperor for Seizing the Throne!” ❤
In his previous life, Fu Chenghan was a foolish emperor. During a personal expedition, he fell for the enemy’s scheme of sowing discord and replaced the accomplished general Xiao Xun, whose achievements had overshadowed his sovereign. As a result, he was defeated and captured.
Xiao Xun turned the tide, slaughtering his way through the chaotic army and killing eighteen enemy generals in succession before rescuing him.
Deeply moved by how rare such a pillar of the realm was, Fu Chenghan took an arrow for Xiao Xun—and died.
0-1-18. The record speaks for itself!
When he opens his eyes again, he has returned to ten years earlier.
At that time, the realm is still intact. Fu Chenghan is only sixteen, while the future great general is still a young palace guard, ordered to watch over him day and night.
Most importantly, his peerless god-of-war father, who died young in his previous life, has not yet had the chance to die!
Fu Chenghan throws his arms around his imperial father’s leg and swears to keep his father healthy and ensure that he reigns for thousands upon thousands of years.
When his father takes alchemical pills recklessly, Fu Chenghan eats them first. When his father is assassinated, he takes the blade. When his father confiscates entire families and exterminates their clans, he rescues the people. When his father indulges in beautiful women, he… Why did his father favor the prime minister?!
If showing special favor to ministers means favoring them all the way into bed, then no wonder Father never suspects his臣下 of rebellion. Quarrels at the head of the bed are made up by the foot of the bed—your father is still your father!
If he had been as close to Xiao Xun in his previous life, then no matter how many methods the enemy possessed, they could never have driven the two of them apart.
After much painful reflection, Fu Chenghan decides to establish his political faction ahead of time. He must hurry up and favor a few ministers.
Naturally, the first in line is his future general who will defend the nation, Xiao Xun.
Following the example of wise rulers of antiquity, Fu Chenghan shares a carriage and a seat with Xiao Xun and sleeps with their feet touching. However, when it comes to favoring a man, he still has no idea how.
Xiao Xun is restrained and self-possessed, stubborn and taciturn, and refuses to teach him no matter what.
Fu Chenghan perseveres and plans to teach himself.
At night, while Xiao Xun is fast asleep, he secretly undoes the other man’s martial robe. Looking at the broad, powerful chest muscles beneath the snow-white undergarments, he is frightened by the warmth radiating from the body. Looking farther down, he sees something bulging and massive, like a horse.
Xiao Xun wakes up.
Fu Chenghan inexplicably feels afraid and hastily backs out. “Tonight, tonight you should sleep by yourself. I have to go find someone else—the strategists are still waiting.”
Xiao Xun grabs Fu Chenghan and pulls him back, pinning him beneath him like prey.
Fu Chenghan finally learns how to favor a minister.
After that night, Xiao Xun becomes even more loyal. He is willing to be beaten and cursed at, gladly serving like an ox or a horse.
By day, Fu Chenghan rides a horse; at night, the horse rides him. :’(
——
★The author writes both top and bottom characters. The values portrayed in the work do not represent the author’s own values. Clicking in means you accept the content warnings by default. If you drop the work, there is no need to inform me.
★If you suspect plagiarism or think this resembles someone else’s work, please bring a comparison chart and report it directly to the Jinjiang reporting center. Creating is not easy, and the author reserves the right to pursue legal action against all defamatory, rumor-spreading, insulting, or attacking remarks.
★The author is emotionally fragile and may close the comments section if unable to withstand the pressure. Please use the internet civilly, so that everyone can enjoy themselves.
Blurb completed on November 13, 2024, and sent to friends for safekeeping. Anyone who steals ideas will make me cry.