Death Is Not to Be Trifled With

Academia + mild Lovecraftian horror. I On the day failed student Cen Nian dropped out, a small admissions ad on a streetlight pole caught his eye. He signed up for the exam-free enrollment at the third-rate vocational school printed on paper—only to realize after admission that the school's curriculum was: teaching you how to slay gods! II Three rules for new students: 1. Gods are not to be trusted. 2. If encountering the undead (dead gods), and rescue fails, take measures: negotiate, attack, contain, or execute—fight until death. 3. Confess your feelings with all your might and pray for divine favor. "..." To survive, Cen Nian endured the shame and poured out his burning, sincere confession to the gods. During a freshman tournament, facing mortal peril, his public confession moved 100,000 gods to pity. Only then did he learn he'd been given the prank version of the rules—and the object of his confession stood above those 100,000 gods. III On the day of the tournament's chaos, teachers and students worldwide witnessed 100,000 gods descending in unison, chanting at the unremarkable, listless blonde in the crowd: "Darling, snuggle!" The only solution? Leave Earth. Unhinged, two-faced top × genuinely hopeless bottom. CW: 1. Dead gods: deceased deities. 2. Features global myths and Lovecraftian lore—all fictionalized AU. Don't take seriously. 3. Inspired by *The Three-Body Problem*. Please avoid mentioning other works in comments (Don’t make me beg TQT!).